When it comes to theology, kids can usually handle more than we think, but they often need us to explain things more simply than we think. How do we do that? Well, as so often in the Christian life, we can look to our Lord and Savior as our model and help.
1. Use the Right Moments
When you read the Gospels, you’ll notice that the majority of Jesus’ teaching occurs either in answer to a question, or in response to something happening in the world around him. We can use the same approach with our kids.
So first, one of the best moments to teach your children a theological truth is when they ask a theological question. However busy you are, do your very best to drop everything when one of your children wants to talk to you about Christ and His Word. (Yes, even at bedtime… Yes, even as you’re trying to leave for work…) Doing so will tell your kids, louder than any words you use, that you think it’s wonderful that they are thinking hard and asking questions.
Then second, use circumstances as teachable moments. If you see a shepherd in the fields with his sheep, tell them about the Good Shepherd (John 10:11-18). If you see lightning in a storm, use the moment to explain what Jesus’ return will be like (Luke 17:24). If you are planting seeds, teach them some theology of the kingdom of God (Mark 4:26-32).
In our family, often the best and most significant theological conversations have happened not in the times we carve out to read the Bible as a family (crucial though doing so is!), but in the rhythms of life—as we go about our chores, as we talk over the dinner table, as one of the kids is being tucked in and says, “So, I have this question…”
2. Use Concrete Terms or Examples (from Scripture if Possible)
Have you ever noticed how often the Gospels record Jesus using concrete things to explain abstract truths? Indeed, throughout the whole Bible God often gives visual aids to his people. Kids in particular think in concrete and visual ways rather than in abstract and propositional ones.
Scripture’s visual aids are a gift to us as parents. The doctrines of sin, of judgment, and of the atonement can all be explained using a curtain—because God had a curtain placed in the temple to do just that. The doctrine of conversion can be explained using the story of your kids’ physical births. And so on.
(Full disclosure: this doesn’t work for all theological concepts—see “the Trinity.” Though even there, kids understand the idea that your family is a loving, serving, joy-filled single unit made up of persons, which makes this a great place to start explaining the nature of God and the relationship between the Father, Son, and Spirit.)
3. Use Simple, Memorable Words
When teaching big theological concepts, it’s good to keep your vocabulary as simple as possible— just as Jesus did. Often, we can be so focused on breaking down a complicated doctrine that we slip into using biblical vocabulary without explaining it. For me, it’s often been as I’ve looked at my kids’ blank faces as I’ve answered a question that I realized I’ve used language that is too advanced for their present level. For instance, an idol means little to a three-year-old. That’s why in God’s Big Promises Bible Storybook we ended up calling idols “not-gods”—things people love and trust as a god, that isn’t a god—because that’s easier for little hearts and minds to grasp.
Your family will likely end up discovering its own way of describing and explaining theological concepts that are helpful and memorable for you as you grow in your knowledge of God and his Word together.
4. Avoid Spiritual Indigestion
I have a tendency to answer a simple question from one of my kids with a twenty-minute excerpt of Grudem’s Systematic Theology. Jesus, on the other hand, gave his listeners plenty to think about, without overwhelming them with a book-length response.. We need to remember that it’s better to give children a digestible amount to chew on than twelve courses of theology that will cause indigestion. Teach a little at a time, but often.
5. Trust the Spirit
We sow the seeds, but God waters them. The humbling yet freeing truth is that you can’t see what is going on inside your kids’ hearts. So we pray, and trust the Spirit to be at work through us (and sometimes despite us). If your family is anything like mine, it will be some time after you have had a conversation about theology with your child, and in a completely different context, that they say something or do something and you suddenly realize that they have listened, remembered, and were shaped by what you said—because the Spirit has kindly used your best efforts to do what you long for, but only he can do—change your child’s heart.
